Yesterday my friend pointed me to a new term that I’ve never heard of: Homeostatic Impulse.
The Homeostatic Impulse is how our subconscious minds are wired to to stay the same. Our habits and our routines come from a deep place within our survival instincts and gives us a sense of security. The older we are, the more we’re used to our patterns and the harder it is to break free of the homeostatic impulse. This is why starting over is so hard to do and so traumatic, especially as we get older.
I feel like I have the opposite problem to homeostatic impulse. I have too much of a novelty impulse.
No one can be more shocked by this realization than myself. In my head I thought that I was a steady, routine oriented person. In reality I have “monkey butt” - I can’t sit seem to sit still.
I used to feel terrible about how many “start-overs” I’ve already had in my career both in law and in writing. I have no specialization. I’ve done a million different odd jobs and I never stuck around long enough to be an expert anything. When I look at my friends who are partners at firms, I can’t help but feel like I’ve wasted my time starting over. This is the same with my writing. Every time I open my Scrivener I feel like I am starting over.
But now I am trying to embrace this more and forgive myself for not being an expert at anything. Maybe I haven’t stuck around to become partner, but I’ve sure done a lot of really interesting things. More important, I generally am having fun doing whatever it is I am doing. Perhaps that’s all that really matters: are you having fun doing it. If so, then screw the rest!
Here’s to those of us with novelty impulses - and starting over, every single day.